Um.... watch your step through here, folks...
Hi Torka! <waving> Oh I see she's headed out to the parking lot to fire up the luv busses. We had 50,000 of them, but, thanks to Torka the speed demon, (and you thought the ride in was harrowing) we're down to just the one. Still, we manage to cram in half a million strong bodies for the Monkee-stock road trips.
Over ---------> that way, I'm sure you can't help but notice the six-story soapbox and sit-in staging area. It comes complete with an emergency phone, so you can order out if you're going to be awhile. We've also installed a lovely glass enclosed elevator, so you won't be out of breath before you make it to the top. If you've got a rant, or just want to speak your mind, that's the place to do it. Don't worry -- we've installed railings all around the top so you won't fall off. Please keep in mind that this list has been officially designated a "flame-free zone", so we do ask that you avoid toasting your fellow listers at all times :)
<Waving at naked guy in distance> Now, that guy over there is Druid. No, not him, that's Zan's man, Nekkid Bob. Druid is the other guy. He built the gorgeous Sauna you see behind him. He'll try to talk you into changing from your work duds into nothing more comfortable <eg>. Feel free, his sauna is "clothing optional" by popular vote, although he did lobby pretty hard for the campaign of "clothing prohibited" which lost by a hair
(Sorry, the FCC won't allow me to show you the pic of the jacuzzi cuz Nekkid Bob jumped into the shot at the last minute)
That smashing young man <pointing, waving> surrounded by our more Davy-eyed lady listers would be Glenn Glenn. He's our resident music expert and patient zero of the dreaded Glenn Glenn disease which makes your posts appear twice.
That guy over there with his back to the typewriter is our author, Nick. From the piles of crumpled paper that are stacked up nearly HEAD high around his desk, I'd say he must be hard at work on the next chapter of "Nicktoon Angora and the Lost City of Cleveland" (the saga of our favorite simians and the legendary Recycle Babes). This story, which has set records for longest time elapsed between chapters, fortold the now legendary events surrounding the Monkees gathering in Cleveland. Eerie, isn't it?
What? You haven't read it? Well, you're in luck! For an unlimited time only, a copy of the original crumpled, coffee stained manuscript is on loan (ok, so we picked it out of his trash) to the cybrary reading room.
But wait! Nictoons isn't the only eerie psychic phenomenon you'll find
here. Another mail malady, is the small matter of Alan's and my
omniscience being contagious, which results in answers showing up before
original posts.
<cue twilight zone theme>
Wave good-bye to your new-found friends. They must be going. You see, Nick, Glenn, Alan and Druid are no longer full time residents of the clubhouse. Along with a number of our beloved oldbies, they are doing undercover missionary work to brainwash the vast masses. Oops, did I say &qot;brainwash"? I meant, spread the Monkee word (which was "pencil," but for some reason, they could say only "crayon", so we changed it.)
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